Barack Obama offered a refreshingly honest glimpse into his marriage with Michelle Obama during a recent appearance at Hamilton College in New York. The former president, now 63, touched on a range of topics—from national policy to global trade—but what truly resonated with the audience was his candid reflection on the relationship that has captivated the public for decades.

Obama confessed during a conversation with College President Steven Tepper.

“So I have been trying to dig myself out of that hole by doing occasionally fun things.”

It was a rare admission, underscoring what many have long suspected: that eight years in the White House, coupled with decades of public service, came with personal costs—especially for a marriage that has often been seen as aspirational.

Barack and Michelle Obama have been married since 1992, and while they’ve frequently spoken about their bond, they’ve also been refreshingly open about its challenges. Michelle, in particular, has never shied away from discussing the strain that politics and public life placed on their relationship.

On her podcast, Michelle once poked fun at one of her husband’s quirks that used to drive her up the wall—his approach to time, or rather, his lack of urgency.